​“What have you been doing all day?” my darling husband says as he walks through the door, after a long day at work. He doesn’t mean it as an accusation, but I take it as one.
 
Yesterday, our freight arrived. I have two little children running round and round tall looming towers of boxes, stacked so high they are starting to sway in the wind. There are 381 of them. It’s all very well that the removal company offer a “surface unpacking service” (i.e. they will put things on surfaces, but not in cupboards), but there are no surfaces. Every inch is covered with piles of random stuff. Despite my finely honed organisational skills, there’s a toothbrush and a pile of toiletries by the kitchen sink, a bike in my lounge and a dolls’ house in my bedroom.

The world today is a funny place, unrecognisable from the carefree days of yesterday - or even yesterday.

A couple of evenings ago, the UK Prime Minister, Boris Johnson, declared a state of emergency. Effectively, it's house arrest unless you need food or medicine. 

It sounds drastic, but we've only fallen in line with other countries - the Coronavirus, or COVID-19, has proven itself to be an invisible opponent outwitting governments across the globe. The number of cases increases by 20% overnight, leaving us looking suspiciously at those around us. Or those that used to be around us now we're in isolation.

Amanda, an American, gave birth to her two children in Dubai, and then moved to the UK. Intrigued with the way they see the world, she hopes their expat experience will give them a broad acceptance of the world, while still understanding their place in it. Here's her story, which is an extra from the book Do they eat soup in England?, available from Amazon:

When we moved to Dubai, I gave up my career to support my husband's promotional opportunity. I arrived in a new country and culture without a plan for myself, but having a family seemed to be the natural step, especially as Dubai is family-friendly. Leaving my career was hard to do at the time, but it's been a wonderful experience and allows us great flexibility as a family.

I was lucky to have both my children in a country with excellent quality private healthcare. While many women choose to return to their home country for birth, that wasn't an option for me due to a 17-hour flight and high-risk pregnancies.

Different parts of the World have visitor peaks at different times of year. You make your decision on a summer or winter vacation based on whether it’s in the northern or southern hemisphere. If you want the soft powdery snow you probably won’t head to the European slopes in July. And if you want to enjoy a glass of something crisp, white and fruity in the warm sunshine of a rose garden, you’ll probably check the weather forecast first. But while important, weather doesn’t always dominate our decision making process when it comes to travel destinations.

So how else can we make a decision? There are endless adventures to embark upon so how can we choose where to go next? Here are some alternative tips for taking a trip:

According to a new global study, the main reason that expat families move home early is the lack of emotional support.
How quickly an expats settle in a new country is as much about what they have left behind, as it is about getting to grips with their new surroundings. It takes nearly 25% expats more than a year to feel settled, but once they do they spend between five and 10 years abroad. 

Even with the squeeze on expat packages, employees are often well supported, surrounded by colleagues and a recognisable business structure. However, economic migration isn’t often possible without the help of spouses and families.

Guest article: 5  top tips to find your perfect condo 

​Relocating to a new country can be a stressful and emotional time. One of the biggest steps to feeling settled is finding the perfect place to live, where you can set up home. Finding the perfect property can be time-consuming and expensive. We've asked Claire O'Donoghue from Greyloft for some guidance. Here are her top tips for making the house-hunting process in Singapore that little bit easier.

1. Know your budget
Consider what your budget is and how flexible you can be with the amount you are prepared to spend. A lot of rents can be negotiated, but this is entirely dependent on the landlord. Have a number in mind that you would be prepared to top up by around 10%, to buy yourself a bit of negotiating room should you find the perfect place but not at the perfect price.

2. Work out what areas work best
It’s time to take out a map of the island, and figure out all the places you and your family will need to get to. Whether its commuting to work, or taking the kids to school, the location needs to work for you. Take time to figure out what amenities you want close by, although do bear in mind that in Singapore nothing is really that far.
There are lots of resources online to help you narrow down which neighbourhood(s) would suit you best.

3. Engage the right agent
Choosing a place to live is probably the most important step in making you feel settled in your new country, so working with someone experienced and professional makes that process a bit easier.
 
In Singapore, both the landlord and the tenant should have an agent to represent them. This can seem overly complicated, but it is the best way to ensure your needs are protected. Pick an agent who you trust and who really understands what you are looking for.
 
Ensure you understand agent commission fees. If your lease is over $3,500 a month and for a period of two years, you don’t have to pay any commission.

4. Understand the process
Once you’ve found your ideal place, your agent will need to submit a Letter of Intent (LoI). This indicates your intention to sign a rental agreement.
 
Once the landlord accepts the offer in the LoI, you are then required to pay your deposit, usually equivalent to two-months rent, for a two-year lease.
 
You will then proceed to sign the tenancy agreement, where you will also be required to pay stamp duty. This is roughly equivalent to 0.4% of the total rental amount (i.e. monthly rental x the number of months). Your agent will collect the payments, before transferring it to IRAS (the tax authority in Singapore).
 
Have a comprehensive inventory list, which details the condition of the property upon move-in. This document can be used to resolve any disputes about damage when you move out.

5. Once you move in
You have a one-month grace period to report any issues with your property to your landlord to be repaired, without any cost to you.
 
You will need to set up an account with Singapore Power for your electricity, gas and water. You’ll also be required to pay a refundable deposit upon receipt of your first bill – currently S$300 if you pay by direct debit – so don’t be shocked if your first bill seems high; utilities are usually relatively affordable. You will also need to make an appointment for City Gas to switch your gas on.
 
SingTel, StarHub and M1 offer a variety of internet and television packages. You can also get your mobile phone services through them too, which helps keep billing simple.
 
A lot of properties are rented unfurnished (apart from white goods) so you may need to hit the shops to furnish your home. Or it may be a case of waiting for your shipping container to arrive, so you can unpack things from your previous place.
 
Then it’s time to sit back, relax, and enjoy your new home. 

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To find out more about Greyloft visit their website or Facebook page.

When I moved to Chicago, I counted my lucky stars that I didn't have to learn a new language. I had enough on my plate: I was moving house for the fourth time in three years, moving away from family across the Atlantic, with a toddler and a new born in tow. I love learning about other cultures, but I am pretty crap at languages.

However, I very quickly learnt that I was learning a new language. You can't go to the supermarket (grocery store) and pick up a trolley (cart), and ask for aubergines, courgettes and nappies (eggplant, zucchini and diapers). People look at your blankly. And why wouldn't they? You are not speaking American.

So what about when people come to the UK, and have to navigate the subtleties and subtext of English? Here are some guidelines. This table has been doing the rounds on the internet. I can't claim to have written it, although I wish I had. The source has become untraceable, but bravo to the author.

Anything to add? Drop us a line below.

Accidents happen all the time. Yesterday I ran into a concrete bollard because I was too busy looking around me instead of where I was going. Embarrassing.

But what about when you travel? How do you avoid the scams? How do you avoid unwanted attention? How do you keep safe?

You’ll never be able to blend in if you have blond hair and blue eyes and you’re travelling around Africa, but it helps to understand what steps you can take to look after yourself.

Here’s our top tips:

1.     Take two wallets – Have a day to day wallet with a little cash and store your cards, majority of your cash, passport etc, somewhere safe (hotel safe, concealed money belt, your socks). You want to avoid people seeing notes falling out of your purse each time you buy a drink. You also won’t lose everything if someone steals it.

2.    Carry a phone that has a camera – not only will you be constantly snapping holiday pics, but if something goes wrong (car crash, room ransacked etc), you can take a photo of the scene before the evidence is disturbed. The photo will automatically be time and date stamped.

3.     Pack your sunglasses – Not only do they protect you from the sun, but if you have blue eyes they will help stop people starting at you if they are not used to seeing your eye colour.

4.     Pack a sarong – useful in so many way: as a scarf when it’s cold; as a beach towel; as a cover-up in air-conditioning; to wrap around your backpack to stop people having access to your pockets;

5.     Secure your stuff – if you’re travelling on a sleeper train and are sharing an open carriage, put all your valuables in your sleeping bag with you. Bring a bike lock and chain your rucksack. Tie your shoes to the bunk. Don’t just slip your passport under your pillow. That’s not enough.

6.     Online security – Use Dropbox, or cloud-based storage, so you have access to documents wherever you are. Use 1Password so you can store all you passwords, scans of your passport and credit card information securely. If your card gets stolen you need to know how to cancel it.

7.     Stay in contact – Leave your flight details with someone at home. Make sure someone knows where you are, even if your plans change.

8.     Stay safe – Get travel insurance, and ensure your vaccinations are up to date.

The more you travel, the more you’ll understand how the world ticks, and the more streetwise you become. The world isn’t a dangerous place, but you don’t want to make yourself a victim.

Do you have a tip to add? We'd love to hear from you.

Dear expats: what do you miss about home?

Every year the expat hubs around the world begin to leak foreigners who flood back to the homeland. Like birds, the migratory pattern is seasonal and routine.

We have lived in two of the world’s biggest global expat hubs, Dubai and Singapore, and the phenomenon is similar in both places.

After school breaks up in June, families depart for the Western world, the husbands only staying a week or two in order to protect their annual leave.

But why do we make this annual trip, at great expense and inconvenience? After all, the husband complains he misses the kids (and occasionally his wife), the children complain that they miss their toys and friends, and the wife is pulling her hair out carting children around single-handedly.

[As an aside, I’ve often heard expat wives complain about hair loss issues. This happens in both Dubai and Singapore. I once put this down to desalinated water (Dubai) and humidity (Singapore). Now I put it down to stress of the Expat Exodus. I’ve just returned from the UK after a four-week trip. One week in Singapore and the plughole looks like the Yeti has fallen down it.]

So back to the subject. There are several reasons why the summer Expat Exodus is a necessary one. Most importantly it is about your identity and place in the world:

1.     We’re expats. We haven’t emigrated. This means we still feel the pull of the homeland. We understand that circumstances and jobs change all the time, and while we may feel that we’re here to stay, we could be gone tomorrow. We are part of a transient society.

2.     The homeland offers us stability in a global economic market that has had its ups and downs. We understand how the homeland ticks. We haven’t had to learn it, unlike our temporary expats homes. There is something comforting and effortless about that.

3.     Culture is important. What is the world without it? And so we ensure our children know what they need to know about bring British, or American, or Australian, or Kiwi.

4.     Family is really where the home is. We make fantastic friends in our expat homes, supporting each other with knowledge and a tissue when our mother is too far away. We all need support, and there is a certain magnetism about being with your own tribe.

5.     Friends also fit into the support category. We are the ones who have moved away and we need to make every effort to stay in touch with homeland friends. Forget about them and your risk feeling like an expat when you return home, starting your network from scratch.

6.     Getting out of the heat. Of course we love the weather where we live, most of the time. But everyone needs a break from 50C heat and 99% humidity.

We all miss different things about our homeland. For some it’s a postal system that runs smoothly (Dubai doesn't have a door to door system). For others it’s the freedom of having a car (Singapore, where the cost is astronomical).

For me, apart from friends and family, it has been the British countryside, gastro pubs and historical houses.  Oh, and strawberries that taste like strawberries, and don’t cost $20 and have a guilty-inducing 10,000 air miles attached to them.

What do you miss and why do you go home? We'd love to know.


Linked to the My Global Life Link-Up at SmallPlanetStudio.com.

My parents recently came to visit us. I asked my mother, Joan Fry, to put together her top tips and advice for visiting Singapore…

As our daughter and family live abroad we have been privileged to stay with them in various countries; the US, the UAE and now Singapore. One of the most interesting challenges we have faced has been to cope with different weather and traditions. Visiting Chicago the worst of the winter weather can be avoided by going spring time or autumn, also the same can be said of Dubai but for a different reason - avoiding the worst of the heat during the summer.

Staying in Singapore is a whole different ball game as the country is so near the equator. The weather is more or less the same all year round. This means it’s hot and steamy, with temperatures ranging from 28C at night to 35C during the day.

After being there a few days, and melting under a hat, we noticed that the locals used umbrellas to keep the sun off. This allows the air to move around and keeps arms and shoulders safe from sunburn; it also has an added benefit of sheltering from the frequent sudden and very heavy rainstorms.

Clothes should be light and easily washed as they need frequent washing. Also shoes need to be comfortable, as feet swell in the heat, and also waterproof.

As with other hot places, there are biting mosquitoes, which although not malarial, can transmit Dengue fever, so it’s essential to apply Deet or some other insect cream. The government does what it can to try to keep mosquitoes down by spraying with insecticide and making sure residents don’t have standing water around to allow them to breed, but inevitably bites happen so don’t forget the antihistamine cream.

All this makes it sound like a most unpleasant place to visit but it’s not. The locals are really friendly and most welcoming. The city is beautiful and lush. There are many flowering trees with ferns growing in the branches and the Frangipane gives the place a delightful perfume.

Although it is supposed to be the most expensive city in the world, it need not break the bank. There are many places to eat reasonably priced meals, such as the Hawkers’ market, where the food is very cheap and among the best. Certainly it’s where the locals eat.

Public transport is again very reasonable, air conditioned and clean. Buy an EZ Link card to swipe in and out. This can be topped up and reused.

Living and being with our grandchildren has opened our eyes, seeing things in a whole new world. Living somewhere is an entirely different experience to travelling through somewhere. The children, now aged seven and five, have no preconceived ideas and notice things that would otherwise go unnoticed. It adds an added dimension to the travel experience when you have a small child as your tour guide.

Here's more..
Down with Dengue Fever - what are the symptoms?
Taking Tiffin: The Tiffin Room at Raffles Hotel
Top ten activities in Singapore